As parents or caregivers, you naturally prioritize your child’s needs and well-being. But with school meetings, therapy sessions, medical appointments, and daily parenting, it can feel overwhelming and leave little time for yourself.
You may be reading this article about self-care with an open mind, or you may have rolled your eyes, bristling at the idea of yet another internet source telling you to meditate. We’re going to tackle this subject a little differently than you might think, so keep on reading, and you may just get exactly what you need.
Westside Supports You: A New Year for Self-Care
At Westside, our therapists are here with you every step of the way. We see you each week—sometimes multiple times, even daily. Over time, we’ve built strong relationships with many of you. Whether you’re coming in energized and full of new ideas or feeling frustrated and exhausted, we’re here to support you.
First, we’d like to acknowledge the difficulty of parenting a special needs child. It’s a hard, beautiful, emotional journey, and you are doing it. Know that whether you have a large community or feel isolated, we are always here for you, offering stability, routine, and listening ears. We want to help—in big ways and small.
A large part of parenting self-care is tackling your biggest parenting challenges. It always feels better to have a plan in place. Think about what aspects of home life are the hardest, and communicate these to your child’s therapy team. We encourage you to schedule a Caregiver Training Session to discuss your child’s goals, progress, and areas of concern. We can work together to create a plan that addresses these challenges both in therapy and at home.
Remember – Westside is here to support you and your entire family!
Why Parents of Special Needs Kids Need to Prioritize Self-Care
Parenting is a journey full of joy and fulfillment, but it also comes with moments of feeling drained and overwhelmed. While all parents need self-care, it’s especially important for those raising children with special needs. The challenges are greater, the intensity higher, and there’s no instruction manual. It’s hard work, and it’s natural to question whether you’re doing the right thing.
If you’re not taking care of yourself, you won’t have the energy, patience, or emotional resilience to support your child in the long run. Self-care isn’t just a luxury—it’s a necessity.
Preventing Burnout
We all know that running on empty eventually leads to burnout, and when you’re in charge of caregiving 24/7, that burnout can sneak up on you fast. Constantly putting your child’s needs ahead of your own is noble, but over time, it can drain your energy reserves until you’ve got nothing left to give.
Improved Emotional Resilience
Taking a break to focus on you isn’t selfish—it’s survival. Self-care helps you manage the whirlwind of stress that inevitably comes with caregiving. When you carve out time to recharge, you’re better able to handle the challenges, the setbacks, and the ever-evolving needs of your family.
Identifying Your Self-Care Needs
Okay – so self-care is important. But do you know how to actually “do” self-care? Do you know what you need to feel your best? If you’re not sure, you’re not alone. Many of us have never taken the time to think about self-care, or we feel like there’s no room in our busy lives to prioritize ourselves.
But self-care doesn’t always mean bubble baths and spa days—it’s about identifying what truly recharges you, so you can show up for both yourself and your family. Let’s break it down into different categories:
- Physical Self-Care
Physical self-care is about meeting your basic needs—getting enough sleep, exercising, and fueling your body with good nutrition. When you take care of your body, you’re better equipped to handle the demands of caregiving, with the energy, patience, and endurance needed for tough days.
- Mental/Emotional Self-Care
Your mental health is just as important as your physical health. If you’re struggling with anxiety, depression, or other mental health challenges, the added demands of special needs parenting can intensify these feelings. Consider seeking therapy, joining support groups, or simply talking to trusted friends or family members for emotional relief.
We recommend resources such as the parenting section on Understood.org and the Parent’s Guide to Autism from Autism Speaks. Westside has also put together a list of Parenting Support Groups on Facebook.
- Social Self-Care
It’s easy to feel isolated when you are hyper-focused on your child’s needs, but staying social helps you feel more balanced. Remember, you’re not just a parent—you play many roles, like a friend, spouse, coworker, sibling, or member of a larger community. Stepping outside of your caregiving role helps you reconnect with who you are as an individual. Whether it’s a monthly dinner with friends or joining a community group, these connections will help recharge you.
- Recreational Self-Care
Don’t forget about hobbies or activities that bring you joy, whether it’s painting, gardening, or dancing in your living room. What do you do for fun? If nothing comes to mind or your “fun” list only includes Netflix, you’re not alone. Many parents feel disconnected from their hobbies, and that’s okay—it’s just where you’re at right now.
Try making a list of things you’re interested in or used to enjoy. Can you incorporate any back into your life, even in a small way? For example, if you love traveling, you could read a travel magazine, follow a travel influencer, or watch a travel show. Sometimes, it’s enough to just explore your interests in other ways!
Don’t have a hobby? No worries! Check out this list of fun ideas. Here’s a list for people who aren’t crafty, and another for inexpensive hobbies.
- Personal Development and Growth
You are more than being a caregiver. It’s easy to forget this, but nurturing your personal growth can nourish your sense of identity beyond caregiving. Taking on new learning opportunities, exploring interests, or even picking up a new skill can help you reconnect with the parts of yourself that bring you joy and satisfaction. You deserve to feel like you’re growing, too.
- Professional Self-Care
Professional self-care involves managing work-life balance, setting boundaries with coworkers or your boss, and clarifying both short and long-term career goals. It’s about ensuring your work aligns with your values and gives you a sense of accomplishment, helping you avoid burnout and maintain career satisfaction. Parenthood may have shifted your values, so take time to reflect and explore how to realign your career with your current priorities.
- Spiritual Self-Care
Spiritual self-care is about connecting with your inner self and finding a sense of peace, purpose, or meaning. Whether through prayer, meditation, or time spent in nature, these practices help nurture your soul and bring balance to your life. Taking time for spiritual reflection can provide strength and clarity, especially during challenging times.
Practical Self-Care Tips for Busy Parents
It’s one thing to acknowledge the importance of self-care, it’s another to find meaningful ways to implement it into your life. The good news is that a little bit goes a long way. Keep an open mind, and let’s explore how to create a realistic plan that works for you.
In your child’s therapy, we always start with an evaluation to assess their current progress and then set specific goals. These goals are often broken down into smaller, more achievable steps with a set timeframe. You can apply the same approach to your self-care goals.
- Pick a Category
Many experts would say to start with your physical self-care – after all, you have basic needs as a human that involve eating, proper hydration, and sleep. We also realize that as parents or caregivers, it may be hard to get a solid night of sleep every night, especially if you have a baby or young child at home.
For that reason, starting with recreational self-care may be easier. Engaging in a hobby or activity that brings you joy can jumpstart your self-care plan and make it easier to set other goals, like exercising or socializing more.
- Set Realistic Self-Care Goals
First things first: let’s get rid of the idea that self-care means some grand, unattainable goal like taking a month-long vacation to the Bahamas. Start small. Set manageable goals that won’t leave you feeling like you’re failing the second you miss one.
Here are a few ideas:
- Read for five minutes before bed.
- Find a podcast you enjoy, and listen to an episode once a week while you’re driving to work.
- Write down three topics you’re interested in—like travel, gardening, or cooking. Then, follow influencers who cover these subjects to fill your social feed with content that brings you joy.
- Visit a hobby store like Hobby Lobby and explore. You’ll find plenty of starter kits for hobbies you may not have considered. Pick one and give it a try! Even if you don’t enjoy it, you’ve learned something new about yourself.
- Find one new recipe per month that you’d like to try.
- Incorporate Mindfulness Practices
You knew it was coming—there’s no way you’ll read about self-care without at least touching on mindfulness. Here’s the thing – mindfulness is one of the easiest things you can do to take care of yourself!
Mindfulness simply means being fully present in the moment, and there are many ways to practice it.
Odds are you’re already practicing self-care, even if you don’t realize it. Do you enjoy coffee in the morning? Take a moment to savor that first sip—notice the smell, taste, and warmth. Do you walk your child into school, daycare, or therapy? Pay attention to the extra steps you’re getting and the interactions with teachers, therapists, or other parents. Be present in the small moments of joy that are part of everyday life, and appreciate them.
Another way to practice mindfulness is through a small meditation. Take a moment to notice five things you can hear, four things you can touch, three things you can see, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. It’s a great way to reduce stress and, believe it or not, help you refocus for the rest of your day. Plus, you don’t need a mountain top to meditate—just a quiet corner will do.
- Delegate Tasks and Accept Help
Here’s a tough one: asking for help. Delegating tasks and accepting help is not a sign of weakness, but rather an act of strength and wisdom. Whether it’s asking a family member to watch your child for a bit or reaching out to a trusted friend for an afternoon of respite, you don’t have to do everything on your own. You’re allowed to share the caregiving load. In fact, asking for help often creates stronger bonds and opens up more opportunities for you to recharge.
Your Next Steps
As we move into the New Year, this can be a meaningful opportunity to reflect on your well-being and create new self-care habits. The year ahead offers a fresh start, not only for your child’s progress but also for you. Don’t lose yourself in the journey—make space for your own needs and know that your self-care is just as important as the care you give to your child.
Reach out to Westside or your child’s therapist for more self-care resources or to connect with other parents in our community. For more information on Westside services, please click the link below or call us at (815) 469-1500.
